No, You Hang Up!

Every Little Helps

Thanks, Tesco!

The internet equivalent of hanging out in the hotel bar

I feel I'm being groomed for something. Something big!

Define: Irony

Imagine Waking Up in Guantanamo Bay...

All credit to the wonderful limmy and ascerbic wit of Charlie Brooker's Weekly Wipe.

eCigarettes: Legitimising Your Weak-Willed Bullshit Since 2008

Just because "smoking" no longer gives you cancer, it doesn't mean it's healthy.

inb4 "that's rich coming from a borderline alcoholic."

Fun fact: France is cray-cray about eCigarettes. Not surprising as a French man spearheaded the use of tobacco in the western world originally. And there you were thinking it was an Irish man, Nick O'Teen all along...

"Who's With Me? Oh"

rabble rabble rabble rabble

'Little Venice'? Try 'Staly-Vegas'

Hahahahah.

I've not one single time heard it referred to as 'Little Venice'.  It's called Staly-Vegas.  Probably on the grounds that it's a wretched hive of scum and villainy.  But yeah, there's totally a shitty canal that runs through the middle of it too.

Sauce: http://www.charleschurch.com/cheshire_stalybridge/the-woodlands-10015

Thanks for the clarification, The Ladders

Yeah, Churches Say a Lot Crazy Things Though...

Remember that they also say that some cosmic Jewish zombie can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him that you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree.